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Time Obsessed
Apr. 10th, 2013 10:38 pm I'm an accountant, and yet the one thing my job has taught me about is time. That everything is now, and time falls through your fingers like sand.
Time is such a strange thing. One moment you think you have it all, and suddenly there's none and you're screwed. For me personally it's more a matter of always putting things for later. I set things aside and say that I'll do it later, and then I don't and suddenly everything is urgent and everything goes down in flames.
Meh, maybe it's just the anxiety talking. This job has been making my anxiety levels soar like woah. I mean, I've always had to live with anxiety and self hatred. It's something that is very ingrained in me. I don't really know why, maybe it's just because...I don't know, everybody expects me to be perfect or something. Which is STUPID since I always fail at everything and have never succeeded at absolutely anything in life.
I'm sort of in a bad mood. My boss called me out today because I'd forgotten to send an email and I've been beating myself over that all day. It always starts like that, and then I can't stop thinking about how useless I am. Gods, this is awfull. And I have to be at work at 7 tomorrow, which sucks too.
I just wanna watch The Devil Wears Prada and not think about anything anymore.
Time is such a strange thing. One moment you think you have it all, and suddenly there's none and you're screwed. For me personally it's more a matter of always putting things for later. I set things aside and say that I'll do it later, and then I don't and suddenly everything is urgent and everything goes down in flames.
Meh, maybe it's just the anxiety talking. This job has been making my anxiety levels soar like woah. I mean, I've always had to live with anxiety and self hatred. It's something that is very ingrained in me. I don't really know why, maybe it's just because...I don't know, everybody expects me to be perfect or something. Which is STUPID since I always fail at everything and have never succeeded at absolutely anything in life.
I'm sort of in a bad mood. My boss called me out today because I'd forgotten to send an email and I've been beating myself over that all day. It always starts like that, and then I can't stop thinking about how useless I am. Gods, this is awfull. And I have to be at work at 7 tomorrow, which sucks too.
I just wanna watch The Devil Wears Prada and not think about anything anymore.
On writing fanfic
Apr. 9th, 2013 05:27 pm I feel so pumped up about the Xiaolin Showdown fanfic I'm writing, it's incredible. It's already at around 10,000 words and I am just reaching the climax *licks delicious fanfic* I'm especially excited because it's a story that I've been wanting to explore for a long while. It's about Jack's relationship with his parents and how that affects his growth and his relationship with Chase.
I probably should be working on my novel, but I started that fanfic more than a year ago and never managed to work on it beyond a few hundred words. But now it's like the words are flying! *Sigh* If only my Yu-Gi-Oh! fanfic could work like that. The damned thing now sits at around 18,000 words and I have barely gotten past the beginning. *flails*
I probably should be working on my novel, but I started that fanfic more than a year ago and never managed to work on it beyond a few hundred words. But now it's like the words are flying! *Sigh* If only my Yu-Gi-Oh! fanfic could work like that. The damned thing now sits at around 18,000 words and I have barely gotten past the beginning. *flails*
Niiiice weekend
Apr. 8th, 2013 04:52 pm It's been a nice weekend. I've been resting and writing fanfic. I don't think I could ask for anything better :)
Because I worked on three days that I should have had off, I could take off last friday and this monday, meaning that I had four days of not working. Really good for relaxing, but I can't help feeling like I'm gonna have a ton of work when I go back tomorrow.
It doesn't help that I had to do a lot of things before going off to my parents' house. On friday I still had classes at school (in fact I had to turn in a project :P) and a Squash game with a couple friends from work. I've been really getting into Squash lately. It's a lot of fun. I've always been interested in tennis, but it's hard to find courts to play in around where I live. There are squash courts around, though and they aren't too expensive.
Talking about expensive! It's barely April 8th and I already feel I have zero money from my latest paycheck. After paying my school's tuition, and the dentist, I barely have enough to survive for the rest of the month. Aaahh, I really need to get some accounting clients soon U.U *sigh*
Anyway, last week my phone company decided it didn't want to give me any internetzz until they finished maintenance in my area. As you can guess, I found that incledibly amusing >:( and I missed an invitation to go out with a few friends and watch a movie.
Maybe that was for the best, though, since the last girl I dated was going to be there, and most of the girls going are her friends. How does one go around something like that? Dating someone, it not working and realizing most of your friends are also friends of that person? Maybe I need to get new friends :P
Because I worked on three days that I should have had off, I could take off last friday and this monday, meaning that I had four days of not working. Really good for relaxing, but I can't help feeling like I'm gonna have a ton of work when I go back tomorrow.
It doesn't help that I had to do a lot of things before going off to my parents' house. On friday I still had classes at school (in fact I had to turn in a project :P) and a Squash game with a couple friends from work. I've been really getting into Squash lately. It's a lot of fun. I've always been interested in tennis, but it's hard to find courts to play in around where I live. There are squash courts around, though and they aren't too expensive.
Talking about expensive! It's barely April 8th and I already feel I have zero money from my latest paycheck. After paying my school's tuition, and the dentist, I barely have enough to survive for the rest of the month. Aaahh, I really need to get some accounting clients soon U.U *sigh*
Anyway, last week my phone company decided it didn't want to give me any internetzz until they finished maintenance in my area. As you can guess, I found that incledibly amusing >:( and I missed an invitation to go out with a few friends and watch a movie.
Maybe that was for the best, though, since the last girl I dated was going to be there, and most of the girls going are her friends. How does one go around something like that? Dating someone, it not working and realizing most of your friends are also friends of that person? Maybe I need to get new friends :P
Odd week at work
Mar. 27th, 2013 11:04 pmIt has been sort of an annoying week at work. I don't have a better word to describe it in english. I mean... Well, the thing is that it's monthly closure at accounting (hope I said that right) so we have to work harder and finish everything two days earlier than usual. Also, because it is tradition that everybody gets Holy Week off from work the entire company went away on vacations while we suckers at accounting had to stay and work harder.
I guess that's what has been pissing me off, the fact that everybody got the week off, but we didn't. I really shouldn't be as annoyed as I was (I've now calmed down) seeing how it's not even an official day off or anything. Apart from that, I kept running into problems at work and kept on making mistakes. AND, I started my period these days. I swear, it always happens at the worst moment! Argh, I hate it.
Well, at the very least I'll get thursday and friday off so I'll be going off to my parents' house tomorrow morning as early as possible. I'm planning on spending as much time as possible doing yoga, because I've been having awful back pain.
I really miss doing yoga U.U I loved it, but since my schedule went crazy, I haven't done any for a long time! Aaah, I can't wait until I can relax away from everything at my parents' house
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I guess that's what has been pissing me off, the fact that everybody got the week off, but we didn't. I really shouldn't be as annoyed as I was (I've now calmed down) seeing how it's not even an official day off or anything. Apart from that, I kept running into problems at work and kept on making mistakes. AND, I started my period these days. I swear, it always happens at the worst moment! Argh, I hate it.
Well, at the very least I'll get thursday and friday off so I'll be going off to my parents' house tomorrow morning as early as possible. I'm planning on spending as much time as possible doing yoga, because I've been having awful back pain.
I really miss doing yoga U.U I loved it, but since my schedule went crazy, I haven't done any for a long time! Aaah, I can't wait until I can relax away from everything at my parents' house
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Source: 24.media.tumblr.com via Sir Edmund on Pinterest
So I just did the math...
Mar. 25th, 2013 09:22 pm And it turns out I was 21 when I last posted to this journal.
Everything has changed so much since then. It seems like so little and so much time has passed at the same time. Hell, I'd even forgotten I had this account! :P
In fact, everything feels strange.
Let's see if this journaling thing goes better here than at my livejournal. Even though I'm crossposting everything there *shrugs*
Everything has changed so much since then. It seems like so little and so much time has passed at the same time. Hell, I'd even forgotten I had this account! :P
In fact, everything feels strange.
Let's see if this journaling thing goes better here than at my livejournal. Even though I'm crossposting everything there *shrugs*
First Post
Jul. 11th, 2010 11:33 pmVery new here. Let's see how it goes ;)
For now, I'll say I like art and reading and I'm very much into Final Fantasy right now. I draw a little in my spare time, when I'm not writing. Here are a few sketches and doodles, because I don't have anything better to say.
( Warning: Very big images )
I'll post more if there's any interest.
For now, I'll say I like art and reading and I'm very much into Final Fantasy right now. I draw a little in my spare time, when I'm not writing. Here are a few sketches and doodles, because I don't have anything better to say.
( Warning: Very big images )
I'll post more if there's any interest.
